Manly

An idea that I've seen surface a lot in the last 1-2 years is what it means to be a man or to be manly. Part of my family & I just finished the 4th season of 60 Days In. There are several instances between the father, Matt, & his son, Andrew, that kind of address the idea of what it means to be a man. The dad clearly thinks it means a certain thing and the son thinks it means another and there's a change in the dad's thinking after the show and during a later discussion.

A discussion started at our house and included my daughter's boyfriend, who immediately claimed nobody sees him and thinks he's manly. He asked me if I did and I said I actually do because being manly is just being a man but trying to be responsible about it. Who's not manly? Somebody who rapes or somebody who abuses and manipulates others. Somebody who doesn't play sports though, is not immediately unmanly. They just have their own interests. Somebody who isn't big or can't win a fight can still be manly. I used to think some of those things weren't manly but they were still acceptable. It takes time to change our perception and sometimes we do kind of make judgments that are not in line with the ways we try to progress. I hope to see perspectives in general open up to a broader and more humane version of what it means to be manly.